by Baxter Black

Who said, “There is no such thing as a stupid question?

1. Is that cow really angry with me for messing
with her cute little calf or is that just a defensive posture
she assumes because it is expected of her?

2. Did Dad rope that front foot on purpose?

3. I had a pickup like that. Have you tried choking it?

4. How come the first calf in the crowding alley is turned
backwards?

5. Did the mill make a mistake, or did you really
recommend taking all the grain outta the finish ration?

6. I’ve never seen a horse do a complete back flip. Did you
teach him that?

7. This Elko is quite a place. Which one of you guys is a
cowboy poet?

8. Why didn’t you quit before you took that last drink?

9. That dog in the gate…is he yours?

10. That’s a great tattoo. Were you drunk?

11. You don’t see too many left handed team ropers. You a
heeler?

12. Does the NO TRESPASSING sign mean I can’t hunt on
your place?

13. Didn’t you know that wire was hot?

14. It worked on the scouring pigs, didn’t it? See, I feel
better already.

15. Sure I can run one of these. How do you start it?

16. Nice dismount. You with the circus?

17. Is the Forest Service upping your AUMs this year?

18. Do you mean to tell me not one of you top hands can
milk a cow?

19. Fifty dollars on a pair of threes! Were you bluffing?

20. Hello…did I wake you?

21. That’s gonna need stitches! Does it hurt?

22. How could you possibly have missed that last steer? We
would’ve won $1500!

23. I didn’t know you could put a book of cowboy poetry as
a ranch expense?

24. Did the packer buyer pay you more when you told him
they weren’t branded?

25. Didn’t you hear me yell “IN!” on the black bally and
“BY!” on the other three?

26. Were you scared? Better go back to the house and
change.